Hundred International Women’s Days have been celebrated, a Socialistic movement turned into a universal movement. There have been many analyses and critiques churned out in the past couple of weeks. Some illustrating how far women empowerment has come since Women’s Suffrage and how much more gender equal our societies have become while some have carefully pointed out the flaws and the deficiencies in the present scheme of things. I intend to do neither. There have been times when I have asked myself if automatic Universal Suffrage was a bad idea in India. We never had a Women’s Suffrage movement. In fact apart from pockets of resistance on social issues regionally, we don’t even realise that women make up half the democratic base in India. But I woke up today asking myself a specific question- what is the failure of Women Empowerment in India? There was only one example which came to my mind.
A couple of weeks back, the baby of one of my closest friends came down with measles. The immediate concern of hers was if she would be able to tend to her child, because measles is associated with a goddess and my friend was about to have her period- an educated woman fearing god’s wrath and being ready to not tend to her sick child.
In a nation where roughly only more than half the population of women is literate, it is a crime that educated women hold on to such dogmas in the name of tradition and culture. True, a person has the right to practice his/her faith. But it should stop the moment when faith encroaches on common sense and science. Education is supposed to set a person free. There is a quote which has been used often that “If you educate a man you educate a person but if you educate a woman you educate a family.”. But, what if the education stops at the gate to her house? When an entire community or society tells her that her common sense colliding with faith is not permissible, she resigns her brain in faith’s and tradition’s favor.
Women in India go through a lot. From the very first step to the last breath. A woman of the general population has to let go of her dreams in order to fulfill the obligations that ‘culture’ bestows on her. Religion just adds insult to the injury. I draw my line at being told by people that I am not worthy of entering god’s abode because I am impure during ‘those days’. Menstrual blood is even a source of endometrial stem cells. Imagine that. Yet, I am impure because the scriptures say so. I, as a woman of more than 12 years of formal education am perfectly satisfied at being treated like a cow. I, as a woman of more than 15 years of education still have to wear a burqa in the hot and humid climate because my faith tells me to. I, as a woman doing her PhD still do not believe condoms are to be used and I believe abortion is a sin, because my priests tell me so.
Reason is not a sin, it is not a crime. On the other hand, not using the right to inquiry that evolution has so graciously gave us, is indeed a crime. If you evolved into a human being, it means you are naturally inclined to ponder over the restraints imposed on you. This functional disability imposed by religion as a mental set is not natural. It is simply a power-play. Women have the capacity to make or break a society. If you keep my thoughts chained, you make sure that I breed docile human beings into the next generation. But on the other hand, if I break free, I am a threat to the status quo, to the social collectiveness which ensures a smooth flow of functioning. And yet, I, the woman of the 21st century, need to be shaken by my shoulders and taken out of my trance by another human being. Even then, I refuse to go beyond the ‘wisdom’ that I shouldn’t refuse my husband sex or go on birth control.
That right there is the failure of women’s empowerment in India, ie, educated, enlightened, tech-savvy women of today not being able to shake past their religious beliefs to lead more fulfilling lives. What is the use of putting the girl child through school then? We campaign for pro-choice, we stand steadfast asking for 33% reservation, we shout against honour killing. But real change begins at home. Unless I am able to tell my parents that they are wrong and that I am going to tend to my sick child no matter what, we as a society are doomed.
Are there any ways out? YES. Girls need to be taught to be proud of their bodies from a young age. They should be made aware that breasts are natural and menstruation is nothing to be ashamed of. If a young girl is confident of her body, it is inevitable that she will question every process which tries to suppress her as a woman. That is how educating girls should move forward. Simultaneously, she should also be equipped with the support system to jeer back at the boys who giggle when she has to be excused from a classroom to change her sanitary pad. When she is told that she cannot attend an auspicious ceremony because of her ‘condition’, she must have the courage to ask why it is so. She should develop a sense of ‘I’ enough to question why her hair should be covered in church and why it is her shame that men become enticed by it. Education must prepare our girls to develop that faculty of questioning which religion suppresses. I would pity a nation full of educated women who are like my friend.
Remember, culture and traditions are not something that sprouted into existence all of a sudden. They are something which continue to evolve. Either you, as a man or a woman can contribute to its progression in a more egalitarian and socially sustainable manner or you can watch the disintegration and destruction of every fundamental right at its root. In simple words- do or die. The choice is yours.
